Monday, January 30, 2012

First Time Mom

The other day, I read a link to THIS article on facebook that really made me think about being a mom.  Not just a mom, but a mom of several children.
This author of the article talked about having 9 children.  She said that first time moms are always approaching her and saying "Wow...I think one is hard!  I don't know how you do it!"

She then went on to agree with them.  It is hard being a new mom.  If you feel like having your first child is hard, don't feel bad, it really is hard!  She went on to describe all of the challenges that are particularly hard the first time because they are new.  She also talked about how with each child you gain more experience and feel more relaxed about what you are doing.  You also have older ones that can help out.

It made me really think about my life.  It was hard to have only one.  How many countless nights did I stay up wondering "is he sick?...should his breathing sound like that?...how high of a fever warrants a visit to the ER?...shouldn't he be talking already?..." etc.  

My first time potty training was HARD!  Once, Saxon went into the garage to get a toy.  He pooped, stepped in it, and then walked back upstairs with poopy foot prints.  I cried.  

My first time nursing was hard.  It didn't go well.  It hurt.  I felt tied to my house because I only had a brief window of time in between nursing when I could run a quick errand before I had to be home and nursing again.  I was constantly exhausted.  I would wake up at night with every change in his breathing.  


When we were expecting Bridger, I worried constantly if Saxon would feel neglected.  He was used to having me all to himself.  I felt guilty for knowing that his little life was about to change.  


I thought 2 kids was pretty hard too.  I didn't worry quite so much about the baby (since I was a little more experienced) but I felt so pulled.  Every time I would sit down to nurse Bridger, Saxon would need something.  Every time I would try to read a book with Saxon, Bridger would cry.  I couldn't take a nap when the baby did because I still had to take care of Saxon.  I was really tired!


Now I have 3 kids, and for some reason, it's a little easier.  The situation hasn't changed, but I have changed.  I am a little more experienced.  A little more confident.  A little more relaxed.  A little stronger.  I know that I can't expect it to be perfect.  I know that I am going to mess up and so are they.  Sometimes it's ok to let them cry...sometimes it's ok to put down what you need to get done so you can read with them.  Sometimes its ok to stay in your pajamas all day.  


With Dalton, I really took the time to relax and appreciate each new baby stage because they don't last very long.  I loved having a tiny new baby.  I loved having a baby who was starting to learn new things.  I let my bigger boys help a lot and they loved the new baby too. I love my 3 boys!


So, like the article, I just wanted to say that if you think your life is hard, it probably really is!  But hang in there, because even if the situation doesn't change, you will get strong enough to handle it. 

2 comments:

  1. SO true - I hear people say that all the time that THEY relaxed more which made it easier when they had their second! we will have to see how you are when you have 6 ;) lol luv ya

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  2. Thanks for this post! I have one and I want another, but sometimes I worry that I can't handle it since my little man takes up pretty much all of my time already. I appreciate your honesty and your wisdom :)

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