Monday, November 7, 2011

The Truth.

When I offered free sponsor spots on my blog, 
my email was flooded was people requesting a spot, and saying wonderful things like:
"I love your blog, you are such a wonderful mom."
It totally made my day!  Seriously.
Then I started feeling a little guilty...

What if they knew that sometimes...I suck...bad.

What if I ran into someone in the grocery store when my kids are having meltdowns?

Or when I'm on my way to preschool looking entirely disheveled. 

So, to ease my conscience, I thought I'd let you in on the truth...
Some truths about my life as a mom:

1.  I can't figure out bedtime.  It's actually really frustrating.  I think my kids' bedtime is 8:00.  So, Nate gets home at 6 and we have dinner.  Around 7 we start baths.  My kids LOVE the bath and want to stay and play for an hour.  Usually I let them because it keeps them entertained while I pick up the house and clean up dinner.  At 8 we make them get out of the bath.  But we can't put them straight to bed because I just put the baby down and I don't want him to wake up.  So, we do jammies and brush teeth and say prayers, and then put them in their bed.  Then they get up.  Bridger needs a drink.  Saxon has to pee.  Someone is hungry.  Someone needs to be snuggled.  Someone wants a story...etc.  Pretty soon it's 10 (ok...sometimes 11) by the time they fall asleep.

2.  I buy my kids each a donut at the grocery store to keep them entertained in the cart while I shop.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  But since I buy the treat first, I can't use the "if you're not good...no treat!" threat.

3.  Sometimes I get a diet coke for breakfast.  Then my kids all want some.  Then we all drink diet coke for breakfast. 

4.  Sometimes I let my kids sleep in my bed.  I can't resist.  When they sneak in during the middle of the night, I snuggle them.  I can't resist a sleepy, cuddly little kid.  Maybe this is contributing to problem #1 (remember how I suck at bedtime?)

5.  Eating healthy is important to me.  Very important.  I try to make everything from scratch and I experiment and make sure that my kids always get a variety of vegetables.  And yet...I didn't take away any of their Halloween candy.  I was either going to be the mean mom who took it away, or an irresponsible mom who let them have it all.  I couldn't bring myself to be the mean mom after they had worked so hard to collect all of the candy.  So, they kept it all, and have been eating candy non-stop for a week.

6.  I never turn down doing something fun in order to maintain "the schedule."  If we get invited to go to the movies but it will end after bedtime...we go anyway.  If we feel like going to the indoor pool instead of doing naptime...we do it.  Whenever we have the chance to go and do something, we do.  Apparently I suck at strict schedules too.

7.  I take my kids everywhere.  I can't afford to hire a babysitter, and I miss them when I'm not around them.  Last year, the boys came with me to see Twilight.  I'm sure everyone else in the theater really appreciated it LOL.

8.  I get "charmed" easily.  My kids know it too.  If I'm yelling and they're being naughty, all they have to do is pull out the charm and they win me over.  My mom told me once that I let them get away with too much because they're funny.  It's true.  But how mad can you be when you're laughing?

9.  I'm still nursing Dalton.  I know...I know...whatever you are thinking, I'm probably thinking too.  It seems to be generally accepted to nurse a baby until they are 1.  I nursed Saxon and Bridger until they were 6 months and we stopped without any problems.  Dalton, however, won't give it up.  Dalton turned one in September.  I only give in and let him nurse once a day...but still...

10.  The truth is...beyond anything else, I love my kids.  Love them beyond measure.  Beyond description.  I can't fathom life without them.  In fact I a worry a lot about "what if something happened to them..." because I can't bear to imagine life without them.  I love them, and I try to deserve them.  Motherhood takes a lot of work.  Constant effort.  So even though I suck (sometimes a lot) I try hard.  And I hope that makes me the same as you...as most mothers out there.  Constantly trying to do our best.  Always learning, and always trying to be better.

13 comments:

  1. Awe girl, you do not "suck bad". You are a normal mommy and it sounds like a great one at that! I'm sure we would all love if everything just worked out right, the kids stayed in bed, acted good in the store without bribery, etc. But it's reality and I think reality is so much better.

    Because in reality, if our little ones didn't climb into bed with us. We would miss in.
    In the middle of a yell, they didn't lighten our mood we would miss it.
    If they didn't get to eat all their halloween candy, they would be mad at us.

    The list goes on. So enjoy it! That's what i've learned to do. I tried the whole schedule thing and I just can't do it, I just roll with the moments now. =D

    *many hugs*

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  2. I've never gotten the whole "take away your kids candy" thing. Maybe because my mom never did (that I know of...), maybe because I'm not as into sweets as others are so I never actually finished all my candy. Either way, I think what you feed your kids all year round is way more important than if you let your kids indulge once a year or not. What is Halloween going to do to them? Give them diabetes? Not if you feed them veggies the rest of the time, which you do!

    [Hahaha, how did your boys like Twilight? ;)]

    You don't suck, you're human. But it's nice to get real pictures of bloggers' lives, so thanks for sharing. :)

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  3. You are a wonderful mother! I actually also suck at bedtime. Archer (my 3 year old) doesn't even have a bed time. My husband works out of state and is gone two weeks at a time, so when he's home he's more strict about bed time. But when it's just the two of us, he sleeps in my bed most nights and we don't go to bed until 930 or 10. He always goes right to sleep cuddled up with me. I use the excuse that he CAN go to sleep on his own, he really can, but he doesn't like to sleep alone. Days when he's really tired he will go out like a light and sleep all night. But I'm not worried. He's my only one and he really won't want to sleep with me forever. :)

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  4. Oh, and I also could care less about schedule. We frequently go to dinner out or at my parents; or to a movie without care of schedule or bed time. Those cherished memories are worth the cost of a later bed time.

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  5. I just came to your blog from a link on my 3 boybarians. I haven't read anything besides this post but I didn't find anything wrong with anything you listed. Besides the pop in the morning thing I do similar stuff with my kids. I love giving them a treat before we start shopping! Sure the threats of no treat are gone but think about how fun shopping trips are now. For my kids at least, they view shopping as more fun because it means treat! (My favorite is when we go to Target and they get an icee. It takes them forever to finish. lol)

    Oh and the real reason I was motivated to comment was I have a baby girl who just turned one in September as well and I'm still nursing her morning, noon, and night. haha! She loves it, I love it :)
    There's nothing wrong with breastfeeding past a year, in fact it's a really great thing to do for them! My husband used to ask me every other day if I was going to wean her just because she passed the magic age of 1 but nope! I'm going to let her self wean. Breastfeeding is such a great thing.
    Here's a helpful link:
    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html

    I don't know you much but it seems to me from the photos and the little bits you just "gave away" in this post that you are a very awesome mom. Don't worry about anything anyone else might think, these aren't bad traits you shared, they're YOUR special mommy traits that your boys will remember and value forever :)

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  6. I think we go through those moments where we don't feel like we are the best mom, but we are! Every mom will have a melt down and every mom will not be all smiles. It's motherhood and it is expected. :)

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  7. Hey Caitlin! I found your blogs a little while ago and have been checking them ever since. It's fun to see what you have been up to since our NH days ;). I loved this post -- it's great that you are keeping it real.

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  8. you are so sweet. i love this....secrete though i still think you are AMAZING!! :)

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  9. I absolutely love this post! I love to hear from other Moms that things aren't perfect! we struggle with bedtime, meal time and a lot of the time in between! but we do the very best we can do! thanks for sharing - I think it makes you even more incredible!

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  10. I loved this post too. You are such a cute mom, I wish when I lived by you we would have hung out, I learn a lot from you. Your a good mama and have your head on straight.. I suck at bedtime too, and I love the skip naps one, I do that to but I feel like no one else does.

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  11. Every mom has their list of dirty little secrets! You are a great mom because you put the kids first! I love it :) And diet coke is always the best breakfast!

    Bekah
    If Work Permits

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  12. I am no good with bed times either. We have a routine but we don't start it at any specific time, besides I like watching dancing with the stars with my kiddos. And I pretty much always get my kids a treat at the store to occupy them. :) you are not alone.

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  13. what? i'm not the only "sucky" mom out there?? sweet!! i think being real is way more important than following every rule : )

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